Does becoming a father mean less sex, less sleep, less attention? It’s great to be a dad, but it can also be quite a period of adjustment, especially if the baby is your first. One aspect of your relationship that remains important is the sexual side of your life together. Here are a few of the most frequently asked questions about men’s sex life after the birth of your baby.
When Can We Have Sex Again?
How quickly you return to having sexual intercourse depends on circumstances.
It is generally advisable that you wait about six weeks after the birth. This allows the woman’s body time to begin to return to normal and allows healing from any surgical intervention during the birth. Your doctor should advise you if this period of time needs to be any longer.
Will My Partner Want Sex?
You will probably find that your partner is less interested in sex than you are at first. The demands of being a mother can leave her feeling preoccupied and more tired. It’s a time when men can feel a bit left out and a little isolated. Remember that this is a common feeling. You both need time to adjust to the new demands of parenthood. Try not to rush things. You should find that your partner’s sex drive will soon return. You have to respect each other’s feelings. Communication, as always, is the most important thing in your relationship. Less pressure and more support and love will all help the process along.
Birth Control After A Baby
When Do You Need To Think About Birth Control?
The answer is straight away. For men condoms and a spermicide are the best and safest form of contraception. Although breastfeeding does delay a woman’s fertility you do not know at exactly what stage that changes and her periods return. Because the internal organs of the woman are stretched (the vaginal walls & the uterus) a diaphragm will not act as an efficient form of birth control. A woman has to be fitted for a new diaphragm two to three months after childbirth.
The only oral contraceptive pill that is safe for breastfeeding mothers is the progesterone mini-pill that her doctor needs to prescribe. The Dr will be able to make that medical judgement about the safety of this form of birth control. The mini-pill does have a small failure rate of 1%-3%. Depo-Provera or other forms of injectable contraceptive may be helpful for some women. It provides a reliable form of birth control to those who find it difficult to take contraceptives orally and their effect lasts from 1 to 3 months.
Encountering Problems?
If you and your partner are having problems with your sex life after the birth of your baby you may need to ask for advice and support. Contact your doctor, midwife, health visitor, or a therapist. The on-line forums can be very helpful and knowing you are not alone in encountering problems and are very supportive.
