More than most, the hymen is a part of the body that carries a lot of political and cultural baggage. It has long been (incorrectly) thought of as a sort of virginal seal hidden deep inside the vagina, stretched like a skin tightly across a drum, just waiting to be broken or popped, an act which heralds the end of virginity and the beginning of all sorts of magical changes.
Everything about this description is inaccurate.
The hymen is actually quite close to the vaginal opening. There is no medical, anatomical, or physiological relationship between the hymen and virginity. The hymen rarely completely covers the vagina (and when it does, that’s a problem). Not all people with vaginas and hymens bleed the first time they have intercourse, and among those who do, the blood is thought to frequently come from other sources, not the hymen. In other words the hymen doesn’t play much of a role even in first time intercourse and it’s not a way of determining whether or not someone has had sex of any kind.
While these truths about the hymen are well understood and even widely agreed upon in the anatomical and scientific literature, myths persist among the general public as well as many health care practitioners.
Even today, when regular medical exams are a matter of course in some countries, and when technology allows us to explore every inch of our bodies from the inside out, descriptions of the hymen vary, and often come with layers of culture meaning that we don’t find in descriptions of other body parts.
For example in 2014 the Oxford English Dictionary still refers to it as “the virginal membrane” despite it having no anatomical relationship to virginity.
Here are some things we know about the hymen.
It’s variously described as a ring of tissue, a series of folds of tissue, and sometimes just a membrane (the word hymen comes from the Greek word for thin skin or membrane). It’s thin, it’s stretchy, and it can usually be found less than an inch inside the vaginal opening. One reason why there are different descriptions of what it looks like is that the hymen changes as we age.
It Isn’t Solid, Or At Least It Shouldn’t Be
Like labia, the hymen can come in all sorts of shapes, but it is usually described as being crescent shaped or like a half moon. The important point is that it doesn’t completely cover or close off the vagina. Given its location, less than an inch from the vaginal opening, if the hymen were a barrier, it would prevent menstrual blood from leaving the body. As it turns out this can happen in rare cases (when it does it’s called an imperforate hymen) and when it does it needs to be corrected (which it can be by a minor procedure).
It Doesn’t Disappear After First Intercourse.
The hymen can wear down and thin out over time (giving birth vaginally usually speeds this process up) but it doesn’t disappear. In fact the hymen can regenerate itself and there are cases where someone who has given vaginal birth, after a while, appears to have a fully intact hymen. Usually the hymen does wear down and thin out but occasionally bits of membrane from the hymen remain and cause pain or discomfort when something is inserted into the vagina (e.g. fingers, sex toys, a penis, a tampon). While this is rare, it’s one possible cause of pain during intercourse, and it can be identified or ruled out during an internal gynecological exam.
It Doesn’t Pop
The hymen is stretchy and, tucked as it is inside the vagina, it’s protected and isn’t altered or damaged by physical activity (doing the splits, riding horses, etc…). In one of the few sex manuals to cover the hymen in any detail, The Guide to Getting It On explains that it is during puberty, specifically the action of estrogen on the hymen, that brings the most dramatic change to the hymen, not the action of first intercourse.
It May Or May Not Hurt, It May Or May Not Bleed
Between the fact that there are other sensitive mucous membranes in the vagina and the implausibility of observational research during first intercourse, it’s not possible to say definitively how often blood appears during first vaginal intercourse, or where that blood comes from. It is however generally agreed that pain during first intercourse is more likely the result of lack of arousal, lack of lubrication, as well as psychological and emotional factors than the stretching of the hymen. And since the hymen is already stretchy and does not contain much blood, it is thought that bleeding may be from small tears in the vagina (which would be more likely if there’s a lack of lubrication and arousal). In any case, what can be said definitively is that pain and bleeding at first intercourse do not always occur, are not a “natural” part of the experience, and when one or the other happens, it isn’t always hymen related.
Learn More
In 2009, frustrated with the number of times they were being asked to re-educate people about the hymen, the Swedish-based sexual health organization RFSU developed an excellent illustrated guide to the hymen and proposed a new name for the hymen, one they argue is more accurate and might allow us to turn a page on the misinformation that has historically been tied to the hymen.
The Center for Young Women’s Health at the Boston Children’s Hospital has a shorter but no less helpful web page with text and illustrations of hymens.
