Even if they don’t want to admit to doing it, most people know what masturbation is. Unlike sex with a partner, the only goal of masturbation is that you enjoy yourself. Which means that the line between beginner and advanced masturbation is one that only you can draw.
But hundreds of years of masturbation myths have left many of us at a loss for ways to spice up our masturbation routine. If you’ve already covered the basics of but feel like you’re in a self-love rut, below you’ll find some masturbation inspiration, with links to dig deeper into the topics that most interest you.
Sex Toys for Solo Stimulation and Fantasy
More and more sex toys are being sold as “relationship enhancers“. But there are few tools as well suited for a job as sex toys are for masturbation. For some of us sex toys provide a kind of consistent stimulation we need to get over the top. For all of us they can provide extra physical and mental stimulation that takes our solo sex lives to the next level.
Using Sex Toys for Masturbation
Sex toys can be a wonderful addition to your masturbation repertoire and for some people sex toys are the first and only way masturbation works for them. Here are a few reasons why sex toys and masturbation go so well together:
- Sex toys provide a kind of strong and consistent stimulation that no human can, so a sex toy may be able to get you over the top in a way that your partner can’t.
- Sex toys can add to sexual fantasy with masturbation. It’s easier to imagine another person in the room when you have a physical object, like a vibrator or dildo, that stands in for them. Only in this case you get to control all the action!
- nipple clamps
- dildos
- anal toys
- penis rings
- blowjob machines
- male masturbators
- and of course, lubricant
Because you’re in charge, you don’t have to worry about what the other person is going to do, how they will react, or how you need to be, you can focus 100% on yourself.
Some people assume that vibrators are the only sex toys that can be used for masturbation. But this isn’t true at all. They’re missing out! Almost any sex toy can be used by yourself, including:
Some sex toys are better suited for masturbation than others. But the limit is your imagination and what makes you feel good.
If you don’t have the funds, you can still make your own fun with homemade sex toys. And if you do, but feel like sex toys aren’t something you should be spending your money on, consider how much pleasure you’ll get from a sex toy versus anything else that you may be thinking about buying, and don’t let sex negativity stop you from doing something for your own sexual pleasure. If you’re confused by all the options, make sure to start with a reputable sex shop and ask lots of questions.
Voyeur Self
When you masturbate what do you see? What are you attending to with your senses? If your mind tends to wander to the same fantasies or distractions, one way to shake up your masturbatory practice is to become a voyeur of yourself.
If you’re sighted you can try to do this literally, with the use of mirrors or recording equipment. If you aren’t, or if watching yourself is too much, there are other ways to focus your aroused attention on the hotness that is you.
Talk Dirty to Yourself
Carol Queen, author of the highly recommended Exhibitionism for the Shy suggests that the best way to get comfortable with talking dirty is to do it when you masturbate. It can also be an amazing way of spicing up your masturbation, and loosening you up in general.
Explore Taboo Fantasy
The fact that masturbation is private and that you are the only person you need to consider when masturbating means it can be an excellent place to explore the limits of your sexual desires. We live in a culture with strong sexual taboos which we learn almost invisibly from an early age. While many would never want to have sex that falls into these culturally taboo categories, most of us imagine it at times. Fantasy during masturbation can be a safer way to explore what we do and don’t want.
Explore New Masturbation Sex Positions
Most people think of sex positions as something you need to figure out with a partner. But a sex position is any position you’re in when you are having sex. And masturbation is a kind of sex. If you think of masturbation as just a utilitarian act, something that must be done, you’re unlikely to bring a kind of Kama Sutra creativity to it. Taking your masturbation from beginner to advanced means putting in the time to explore other physical options for self pleasure.
