Valentine’s Day is a contradictory affair. On the one hand, it’s a huge commercial enterprise, with Valentine’s Day spending expected to be over $13 billion, in the U.S. alone. On the other hand, as the history of Valentine’s Day tells it, it’s all about expressing feelings of love and focusing attention on the important romantic relationships in our lives.
Do we need to go into debt to properly express our love and devotion? Can consumer goods ever fully convey our intimate feelings of lust and love to our partner?
While I like getting shiny new presents as much as the next person, I want to argue that nothing is sexier than something you’ve made yourself. DIY is the ultimate eroticism because in creating something for your lover from scratch, you are evoking the most basic act of creation itself, the lust from which we all first sprouted. Or, in less ridiculous language, when you put time and effort into making something it comes across. It’s a way of showing that your love is personal.
Consider then the following ideas for Valentine’s Day gifts that will wow your lover, speak your heart, and cost almost nothing!
Valentine’s Day DIY Project #1
Write love poetry
Forget about the flowery verse you’re imagining with a lot of “thous” and “beset”. Over thinking it will only take aware from the spontaneity and fun. If you don’t have a lot of prior experience, don’t worry about writing a sonnet or even something for public consumption. Write fun, raunchy, bawdy love poetry. If you want to get laughs, make sure it rhymes. Try not to rhyme yourself in a corner (avoid the words “orange” and “vagina”). Need more help?
Valentine’s Day DIY Project #2
Homemade sex toys
A store bought sex toy can be a great gift, but how much more special is one made by your own loving hands? Homemade sex toys may lack the glitz of a shiny new gold plated vibrator or the gloss of a brand new blowjob toy, but no mass manufactured vibrator, no matter how powerful, can communicate the kind of love as a handcrafted erotic instrument.
Valentine’s Day DIY Project #3
Tell your partner the story of how you met
Whether you were fixed up on a blind date, met at a funeral, or were childhood sweethearts, take some time to write out the story of how you first met your partner, and how you fell in love. Don’t try to be “writer-ly”. Just tell the story in your own words. What was happening in your life, and in the world around you when you first met. What did your family and friends think of the relationship at first? It can be a fun personal exercise in memory recall to do this, and if each of you does it, you’ll be amazed at the details only one of you will remember, and the small differences in the way you both remember it happening. The goal here is not historical accuracy. Focus as much on the emotional memories as the concrete things that happened.
Valentine’s Day DIY Project #4
Take sexy pictures of each other
Professional erotic photographer Luis Butler offers these tips on how to take erotic photos. Don’t forget to cover your privacy needs, and shoot safely this Valentine’s Day.
Valentine’s Day DIY Project #5
Write your own sex manual.
I’m not suggesting a second career as a sex expert, or putting together a 200 page manuscript. Even if you don’t have ideas of your own, check out these sex tips for the rest of us and pick a few of your favorites (or adapt a few to make them more to your liking). Then make a book to present to your lover. Get old school with construction paper and white glue, or fancy with bindings or complicated folding arrangements. Either way, it’s a handmade gift and a nudge in a few new sexual directions.
Valentine’s Day DIY Project #6
Do something sexy and crafty
We tend to associate arts and crafts with something for kids. But arts and crafts can not only be fun, it can be adult (and even erotic). Whether you want to try your hand at sexy cross stitching , erotic rug hooking, or explore sensual ceramics , it’s time to get your hands moving (and dirty) for Valentine’s Day.
Valentine’s Day DIY Project #7
Make your own “sex checks”
This always popular gift item available at many fine sex shops offers a series of gift certificates, each good for a sexual service, romantic evening, or simply a night off from household responsibilities. One check might be redeemable for your unconditional sexual services for a day, another might be good for a back rub, or breakfast in bed, in the nude. The beauty of this gift is that you make the checks, so you get to determine the focus and boundaries of all the action.
Valentine’s Day DIY Project #8
Make a romantic meal (only if you’re the one who doesn’t cook)
In most couples one partner takes on a majority of the cooking. Even if you love cooking, it’s nice to have a night off once in a while, and for the partner that needs some creative motivation to get cooking in the kitchen, Valentine’s Day could be the inspiration for you.
