How Big Are His… Pupils?
In the body language world, the size of a man’s (or woman’s for that matter) pupils really do matter. A small, pinprick-like eye means either it’s really bright out, or they’re just not that into you. A large, almost oversized pupil means it’s either really low lighting (why candlelight is so romantic!), or their body can’t help but to take all of you in – their pupils must dilate! This is also what happens when you “see the person from across the room” and everything stops, or there’s a spotlight on them – your pupils get so big that all you can see is that other person.
This is my favorite, and most-used clue to tell if someone likes me, a client or a friend, and it’s (almost) impossible to fake, depending on the light conditions. Before we knew that belladonna was lethal to humans over time, women used the herb in tincture form to dilate their pupils unnaturally, thus making them more attractive.
Which Way Does She Look?
When a person makes eye contact with you, how they look away says everything about what they think and feel about you – even if they aren’t consciously aware of it themselves.
For those attracted to females, next time you see a beautiful woman, make eye contact with her, and hold the gaze until she looks away. Watch where she looks and use that information to determine whether you should approach or not.
A look up, even slightly, is the same as rolling your eyes at someone – don’t even bother wasting your time. A look sideways means they’re unsure, don’t know, essentially scanning the space to see if there’s someone more suitable. A look down? Jackpot! This signifies femininity, a touch of deference, and perhaps even a blush or a “wow, I can’t handle this intensity, just give me a second to compose myself“. If there’s a smile, even better – go talk to this woman right away.
For those attracted to men, how someone looks away is a bit different. An alpha male will hold eye contact until the other person looks away, if they’re interested at all. Softer, gentler men will likely exhibit the same behaviors as the gals in the paragraph above, and almost every gentleman won’t even “see” you if they’re anything but attracted to you. As an example, I was with my partner the other day, and a woman tried to get his attention. She spoke loudly, put herself in his path, and played with her hair a lot.
He however didn’t even notice her, it was like she didn’t exist. I asked, “Did you see that woman trying to get your attention?” and his reply was, as he looked around us, “What woman?“
What Geometry Do They Use?
When someone finds you attractive, watch their shoulders and feet. Perhaps they’re across the room from you, or maybe they’re sitting right next to you. When their shoulders and/or feet point towards you, they’re interested. Now, there might be other people in the way, or it isn’t clear if it’s you or someone else near you – and so that’s when you start moving around to see if their body language compensates accordingly.
Think of it like a triangle, or even a door. When a person likes you, they’ll create a triangle between your body and theirs, and usually the closest exit. They’ll literally block off anyone else from connecting with you on an energetic level, so watch where everything points.
The picture I’ve chosen to describe this body language cue demonstrates my intentions perfectly: he’s laughing, she’s laughing, however only one of them has their shoulders pointed to the other. If I were working with the female client here, I’d tell her honestly that the man doesn’t seem interested, but rather treats her more like a friend, someone he’s literally giving the shoulder to. His body has blocked her completely from connecting in any way other than the eyes, and he’s closed off to getting to know her better. She however is open and willing, at least partially, to get to know him better, or perhaps she’s more interested in the camera person than the gent she’s sitting next to.
Do They Fiddle?
Watch how the person you’re interested in moves and touches themselves or other objects around them when you’re conversing. Fiddling, stroking, and caressing are all signs that they’re very much interested, and if you really watch closely, you might even see them doing something truly surprising to show you just how attracted they really are. As an example, I was out with a friend a few days ago, and he was hitting on the waitress.
While talking about it, he looked at her longingly and then started stroking his fingers in a very suggestive manner. When I pointed it out, he looked at his fingers in surprise – he was completely unaware he was doing it.
Looking at the picture, we have several cues here as to who is interested in whom (or not). The woman strokes her hair and her glass at the same time, showing definite interest with both moves. Sadly however, she’s looking to the side and up with her shoulders facing off camera – a clear sign she’s not interested in the man in the photo. The gentleman, while facing her clearly and smiling openly, is forcing a smile for the picture. He may well just have had a moment in the picture where he was physically uncomfortable, however my guess is that this man was just as disinterested in her as she is him. I’m thinking both of them have someone else off-camera that they’re more attracted to.
