Take These Steps In The Moments Leading Up To The Kiss!
When you’ve never kissed a guy or girl before, it can be an intimidating prospect. Right before my own first kiss, I was shaking so hard that my girlfriend at the time must have thought that I was either chilly or diabetic. Thankfully, I’ve experienced all the stress of making a potential mistake so you don’t have to. Follow the simple guide below, and you’ll come off like a kissing pro:
Prepare For Launch
First, make sure that your breath is pleasant (gum! mints!) and your lips are kissable (gloss! balm!). Using such products will also make it clear that you’ve got your mouth in mind.
Send The Signals
You can’t just plant your lips on a guy or girl without a hint of warning – you’ve got to send the right signals so that he or she can be ready to receive you. Make eye contact with your partner while maintaining an approachable expression (feel free to smile!). Projecting a safe, inviting vibe with your face and body language will set things in the right direction.
Physically Connect
Inch closer to the person so you won’t have to lean across an entire couch to make your move. Ideally, you’ll have periodically, briefly touched your partner throughout the night – now you can establish a longer physical connection by putting a hand on his or her arm or leg. There’s nothing worse than hijacking someone with an unwanted, unanticipated grab, so avoid drastic surprises – ease into it!
Verbal Cues
Compliment your crush with something simple and sincere.
Comment on his or her hair, eyes, or smile. Praise his or her sense of humor, kindness, or intelligence. Or, you can say something nice about the date itself (e.g. “I’ve been having a great time with you tonight”). Whatever you choose to articulate, set the mood by either subtly implying or directly conveying your romantic attraction to the other person.
Move In
When the moment is right, close your eyes, lean in, and put your lips against your partners’.
Now you’re ready for PART 2 – proper kissing technique!
So you’ve just moved in to make contact with your partner’s lips. Now then, you ask, “how do I physically kiss?”. Read on for all the technique you’ll ever need:
Test the Waters
Start with a short, soft peck. Maybe another quickly after, too. Then back off for a few seconds to take note of how your partner has responded. Is he smiling? Does she say something encouraging? If your partner seems receptive, you’re cleared for the next step…
Lock Lips
Move in again, and lock lips with your partner. For best positioning, stack your lips with your partner so that your lower and upper lips each lie slightly above his or her lower and upper lips, respectively. It’s like a 4-layer lip sandwich with alternating lips. Now get your passport ready… It’s time to travel to France!
Use Tongue
Open your mouth very slightly, and gently, slowly run your tongue over your partner’s lip. Again, take note of how he or she reacts – if positively, you can increase the intensity of the kiss by sliding your tongue (once more, GENTLY!) into your partner’s mouth to make contact with his or her tongue. Keep it moving – leaving your tongue sitting in someone’s mouth like a dead fish will end the kiss quicker than you can say “French kiss”. Only go deeper and harder incrementally, according to your partner’s motions.
Use Your Hands
Your hands are actually almost as important to the kiss as your mouth is. Rather than dragging your appendages around like a couple of limp salamis, put them to use by lightly holding or caressing your partner’s face, shoulders, or waist.
You can also use your hands to pull your partner in closer once things are nice and steamy.
Change Things Up
Once you’ve settled in comfortably, it’s important to start varying your technique. Use different amounts of pressure, tongue movement, and lip formation to keep you and your partner from getting bored. Experiment to see what gets a good response from your partner, and don’t be afraid to take breaks. Changing things up will keep the kiss exciting… and might even lead to something more!
…AND AVOID THE FOLLOWING!
- Slobbering – Try to control your saliva. If you build up too much in your mouth, swallow. If your lips get too wet, pull away slightly to bring the fluid into your mouth.
- Forgetting to Breathe – Breathe evenly and normally. Try to use your nose for this as much as possible, but again – taking a break is always better than passing out!
- Smacking – Don’t smack like a baby blowing kisses. The noise is distracting, and it generally ruins the flow of the kiss (not to mention it’s reminiscent of babies).
- Smashing – Keep things light at first, and add pressure as you feel out your partner’s style. Too much pressure can be uncomfortable and come off as desperate.
- Rushing – Take your time, and follow the pacing cues of your partner. Taking things slowly will also allow your partner to express his or herself if anything needs to change.
